Beautifully Blessed

A lot of times in this life, people question, why something does or doesn’t happen. They question whether they are being punished, whether God is mad at them, whether the universe hates them, etc. I always find it so interesting to hear people talk about life in those ways. It often makes me sad. I am an optimistic person by nature, it is easy for me to look on the bright side and try to see the good in certain situations.
But I will be honest, when I had a miscarriage, and then had a very terrible pregnancy the whole time I was pregnant I kept saying “I don’t care what it is as long as it is healthy.” That was my motto. That was how I got through the endless vomiting, the hospital admissions, the surgery while pregnant, the severe eclampsia and HELLP syndrome and complications. And then I had my sweet Samuel Lee. His name means, “shelter from the storm” and “God has heard.”
And then he began to be ill. Began to have all kinds of illnesses, scary things kept happening. Numerous hospital admissions, and specialists, and scary diagnosis. And finally a diagnosis of an immune deficiency. And I remember feeling terrified and overwhelmed, but at the same time feeling relieved that we finally had an answer.
I remember people questioning me and my faith. I remember people making comments about just needing to pray harder and that God would heal him. I remember being told that if my faith was strong my child would be healed. And in those moments of such hurt from those comments God came to me. And He explained things to me in a way that my aching momma heart couldn’t grasp without His supernatural help.
We have not been promised that this life will be easy. We have not been promised health, wealth or happiness. But we have been promised that HE will be with us through it all and that HE will comfort us as we allow Him.
Honestly? Yes I pictured myself as a soccer mom running here and there to games and practices and just living a busy life. But that is not the life that I am called to live. God has called me to have these amazing children. And instead of running here and there to games and practices, I am running here and there to doctor’s appointments, hospitals for infusions and specialists all over the place.
But you know what? I wouldn’t change it. My kids are truly compassionate loving souls who have genuine love and caring hearts for those that are hurting. They know what it is like to feel sick and scared, they have no problem praying for people who are sick, for comforting others who are hurting. They have no problem talking to God like HE is right beside them. And that is worth more than any soccer game that we miss!
I didn’t picture this life, I didn’t picture the financial struggles, the health struggles, the exhaustion and uncertainty. But I also didn’t picture my 4 children at incredibly young ages having the faith that they have, having the relationship to talk with their heavenly Father that they do. It is amazing. And nothing is more important than them having eternity to with their Heavenly Father.
I don’t know your situation. I don’t know your hurts and struggles. I don’t know the fears that you have. But I do know that without a doubt that God can use ANY SITUATION for His glory! Be blessed! Have faith! Find a person to pray with, encourage you and share your heart with. God can bring you through whatever you are struggling with. This life can be overwhelming I know, but He gives us what we need to thrive and be BEAUTIFULLY BLESSED