Preparing for Hurricane Florence

We are in the projected path of this monstrous storm. And strangely I am not stressing. I know just as with so many other situations that God has got this. Yesterday an elementary school out in Wayne county posted a video to facebook of the students singing “In the eye of the storm” What an incredible reminder that God is faithful no matter what. The Carolina’s are most likely going to get hit hard. But God remains in control always. I am sad that I will have to leave my babies until it is safe to travel again. That is the one thing that stinks about being an important part of the system of caring for others. In the midst of situations where you want to be with your family you HAVE TO LEAVE THEM. I hate that part. Last night we all snuggled on the couch and watched a movie together. I am not sure when I will come back home, and I am sad knowing that most likely they will have no power and will be scared and I won’t be able to help Matt with them. But regardless I know I am needed at the hospital and that God will keep us all safe in His hand! Be praying for us, for the Carolina’s and for VA. And anywhere else this crazy storm is going to go.

A brand new year of possibility

I am one of those mom’s who loves my kids, loves having them home and is sad when they have to be gone all day long…. this summer has been full of great adventure and lots of happiness. This summer has also been incredibly bittersweet. Knowing that all of my babies would be staying at school all day. I have lived this crazy chaotic life of working overnight and coming home and taking care of my kids while Matt is at work and trying to juggle taking a nap and watch the kids. I have closed all the doors to a crawler in the living room and just laid on the floor too exhausted to move and just been a jungle gym for them. I have stayed awake for more than two days when we didn’t have a sitter to watch them so I could nap. But truly? I wouldn’t give back a single moment. I do wish I could have stayed home and not worked, and been able to enjoy all the moments when I wasn’t tired. But that was not a part of God’s plan for our life. So here we are embarking on a new journey. A journey where I have no preschoolers! A journey where I can come home from work and go to sleep and sleep until I wake up. A journey where I have time to be me. It has been twelve years since I brought Sam home. We have had a crazy wild roller coaster ride. And I love my life. I am sad that this phase is now behind me. I am sad that the schools have my kids longer awake than I will.

But I am also excited. Excited for the friendships that will be made. Excited for the learning that will occur. Excited for the adventures, sports, art projects, concerts, and growing up that they will do this year. I am excited to see all that 7th, 5th, 2nd and kindergarten has to offer. I AM EXCITED TO SLEEP 🙂

But I am also concerned. Concerned for the children who are raised in loveless angry homes. Who come to school bitter and angry. The kids who haven’t been taught to be kind and loving and respectful. The kids who have never received love or who don’t know how to love. I am concerned for the teachers that are tired, that are burnt out and don’t receive the support and supplies they need from their district. I am concerned for the parents who don’t parent their children, and don’t correct poor behavior that will affect other children.

But you know what? God knows! God knows our hearts. God knows our needs and sees those who are broken hearted. As I sent my babies to school this week my prayer has been that God will literally shine through them. That when they see kids that are struggling that they will be the nice kids, the kids that help and support and encourage. We spoke about bullies, and we spoke about how bullies probably also are hurting, and that bullies don’t need people to be mean to them, they need people to love on them and be kind and most importantly to pray for them. So that my friends is what I ask you to do. If you are reading these words. PRAY! Pray for our kids, our teachers, our administrators. Pray for the education system in America. Teach your kids to be kind and loving to everyone. God will be with them. God will go before them. God speed my beautiful babies! I love you more than you will ever know! May this be an incredible year!

The End of another year

cannot believe we have completed another year of school. This year has been one of many challenges for our family. Financially, emotionally, physically and spiritually God has really met our needs. I cannot say that things have been easy or that we have always been happy and focused on the knowledge that God would meet the need when it was needed. But HE DID! This year for me I struggled so much with the finances. Having chronically ill children has put such a tremendous financial burden on our family. But God!!! That is all I can say! When I couldn’t figure it out He did. When I lost my hope He gave it back, when I felt like I was too tired and couldn’t work one more extra shift, and not sleep, He gave me what I needed to press on. And here we are these beauties of mine had a great year, well to be honest this year was a challenge for Sam, but he did it and did well, and God blessed him with some good friends, which was so needed.
Sam survived his first year of middle school. I can say it was as bad as I feared unfortunately. And the terrible thing is that it wasn’t about the kids that made it bad, it was the teachers. Sam is an incredible student and he made superintendents list all year (>95 in all classes) in honors classes. But there were two teachers that were just terrible to him. And it broke my heart. I might have unleased momma bear on one of them …. things improved after that. But Sam has struggled more this year with fatigue and stamina so as he is aging the medical is starting to play a bigger role in his life again.
Sophia finished the fourth grade with a great group of friends, with great grades, and with lots of excitement about being the oldest in the school in the fall! She continues to thrive and be social and make friends so easily. She is athletic and funny and loving. God is molding her into an incredible young lady.
My sweet little Preston really found himself this year. He struggled so much in kindergarden and I was so worried that this would be a terrible year. But God grew him so much and he thrived this year. He has surpassed grade level expectations and did amazing. He still fatigues easily and struggles when his immune system is down, but he did it and I am so proud.
My littlest love started Pre-K this year. She was so ready to be a “big kid” and go to school. We were so blessed to send her to a school where the principal and many of the staff were believers and weren’t afraid at all to share it with the students. I remember the first day walking into the school (public)_ and being over the moon excited to see scripture and Christian beliefs displayed. Paisley became such a compassionate child this year. She experienced being on the other side of being sick. There was a child in her class who had had a stroke and was in a wheelchair, she always helped him. Several teachers on several occasions reported that she helped whenever someone was hurt or sick or needed help. It blesses my heart so much to know this.
I look at these kids with such awe. I still cannot believe that I have been chosen to be there momma. How did God choose me? Yes these days can be so long and so exhausting but more than that they are a blessing, it is a blessing to watch what God has planned for these four incredible kids! I cannot wait for the fun summer adventures. The time that I get to love on my babies, in a hopefully less busy schedule. HAPPY SUMMER 2018!!!!!

My Sweet Sophia Grace

he day of your birth 10 years ago was one of such anxiety but also incredible beauty. You see I had already been in the hospital for several days by your birthday. I had been being monitored because of my liver as well as my blood pressure. That morning they had taken blood and noticed that my liver wasn’t functioning as it should, and they determined that I would have to have an emergency C-section that day, as you were also facing the wrong way, trying to come out feet first. I remember being so scared. I tried to call Meme’ but there was no answer. I then called grandpa, auntie Denise, Uncle DJ Uncle Dennis and Auntie Doreen. But no one was answering the phone! I was getting so upset because I needed to tell them you were coming.

What I didn’t know was that at that very time your grandpa was having a heart attack and that everyone was avoiding my phone calls so that they didn’t have to tell me. They were protecting me from something that there was nothing that I could do to help. And so we called your auntie TeeTee to see if she could take Sam so that Daddy could come in the delivery room with me. I remember weeping for joy when you came out. You were the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. You had these beautiful chocolatey eyes and these perfect little pouty lips. You were seriously the most perfect gorgeous baby I had ever seen. And when you cried immediately after birth it truly was one of the most amazing days of my life. I was laying there waiting to hear you cry and you did. It was amazing!

And now you, my gorgeous girl are ten! I cannot even fathom that time is flying so quickly by. I look at the resilience you have, your zeal for life, the way you allow people to see your heart, your courage and energy and I cannot believe that you are mine. You have been such a blessing to me. I am so enjoying watching you grow up into the woman God wants you to be. My prayer is that 10 is a year in which you become so close to God and His will for your life. That you realize the incredible blessing and gift that you are. And that you know how much I love you!!!! Happy birthday BEAUTIFUL sweet compassionate creative smart hard working dedicated and talented little lady!!!! KODAK Digital Still Camera

My sweet kids

I came to lay down for a half an hour before I work 12 hours over night and found this sweet card from Preston under my pillow. This little guy is just so so sweet.

I so cherish these moments. The swet innocence that they are full of. Raising children in the world in 2018 is certainly a challenge. The fight the devil is waging against God’s people is in full force as more and more people become fearful of speaking His name. I am proud to be a Christian proud to be raising my children to be God serving loving compassionate beings. No matter what happens in this world they can’t take Christ out of our hearts.

How would you know?

A beautiful reminder…..

*I didn’t write this and am unsure who did. But was posted on Facebook and I asked that person if I could share…..

If you never felt pain , then how would you know that I am your HEALER?

If you never went through difficulties, then how would you know that I am your DELIVERER?

If you never had a trial, how could you call yourself an OVER-COMER?

If you never felt sadness then how would you know that I’m a COMFORTER ?

If you never made a mistake, then how would you know that I am FORGIVING ?

If you knew all, then how would you know that I will answer your questions?

If you never were in trouble, then how would you know that I would come to your rescue ?

If you never were broken then how would you know that I can make you whole ?

If you never had a problem, then how would you know that I can solve them?

If I gave you all things then how would you appreciate them ?

If I never corrected you then how would you know that I love you?

If you had all power then how would you learn to depend on me?

If your life was perfect then what would you need me for?

~GOD

This speaks directly to me. I worked last night and came home this morning exhausted and desperately wanting to nap. But due to the current weather here in the south my kiddos had no school. No rest for the weary. 😀 I so wanted to go to church tonight but road conditions are deteriorating. But I am warm and dry with a full belly with a beautiful family. I am blessed! My kids got new masks today to protect them from all the nasty germs out there

Trying to find my calling

We all know that God calls us. We don’t all know what He calls us to do…. I have struggled so often with this. God what is it that you want me to do. How can I love your people like you want me to. How can I be your hands and feet extended? And as I am seeking His will, I am shown the day to day, the seemingly small interactions with people are a part of my ministry and yours too.

God places people in our path every day that need Him! EVERY DAY! You can change a life EVERY DAY! By being His hands! Giving someone a hug, reaching out and serving someone who is weak or sick. Paying for the person’s coffee, baysitting for that young mom who has no one else. Telling someone that they look nice, thanking someone for their kindness or hard work. We have so many opportunities. I have been seeking His will and His direction, and He has been directing it all along.

Now I am not saying that there isn’t more. That He doesn’t have something else, but I am just saying that as you are seeking and desiring His will, use each step along the journey.

I am really excited to be able to take a journey with a Christian counseling center for pregnant women. I have been feeling his call for me to serve here for a while now. I just didn’t know how I could financially pay for the class to become able to counsel these girls. You know what happened? My small group leader Yvonne mentioned how she knew that God was calling me into ministry she just hadn’t had confirmation about where yet. And then I mentioned Grace Connection to my small group leader at church. And she said that they would pay! WOW GOD!!!! I was blown away. I didn’t even think to ask God to send someone to pay for this. But God in the midst of my desire sent the right person to talk to me about serving.

This weekend was supposed to be a weekend away with our church family. But my kids have the flu. Matt took my oldest and youngest and I stayed home with Preston and Sophia since they have the flu. I was tired. I was worried. When Sophia’s temperature hit 105.4 I was scared. BUT GOD! My mom came, my friends and family were praying, and today this morning both Preston and Sophia are no longer out of it, are no longer running fevers, and are playful and happy.

I was so disappointed to not go away this weekend. But staying home has allowed me to listen to church on line. My home church in Winchendon Massachusetts has a new pastor, And he is wonderful. I don’t often get to listen to his services, but my desire is that I can make the time each week to listen to it moving forward in 2018.

Today my prayer for you and for me is that you begin to realize that yes God has called you and He has an amazing plan for your life. But that He also has amazing plans for every step of the way. God’s got you, ALWAYS

GOD BLESS!!!!

Battles and Blessings

This walk, this journey, is full of battles and blessings. My scripture reading for today discussed this topical thoroughly. “When we are in the battle it is hard to believe that it will ever come to an end. When we are in a period of blessing we sometimes expect it to go on forever. But life is not like that. There are battles and blessings.”

Proverbs 1:1-7 gives us wisdom for daily living. Joyce Meyer says, that wisdom “is choosing to do now what you will be happy with later on” Wisdom is the fear of the Lord, wisdom is to respect and honor Him. If we honor Him daily, with reverence, if we seek His wisdom and guidance, we will be blessed by His presence in every aspect of our lives, whether we are in a period of battle or a period of blessing.

Sometimes as a mom of 4 children every day life can feel overwhelming, and like a battle. The days when there is lots of whining, or when kids are sick and feeling terrible, when they are short with one another and not getting along. Or when your to do list seems miles long, and your days to do it are just too short. Today was one of those days for me. We are originally from Massachusetts but since we have moved south we are in a area where snow causes everything to shut down. My kids had school cancelled for today and tomorrow, there isn’t even an inch of snow that fell. And therein lies my problem, my battle….. I have so much to do and now am unable to. The kids are home and I absolutely love having the time with them, to do puzzles and games and play…. but that eradicates any time to do my mile long to do list.

Tonight as I did my little Sassy’s infusion, I was reminded that God is with us in all of lifes battles. Some days my sweet 4year old doesn’t mind those needles and some days I am the meanest mom ever for doing it to her. A little snuggle, a little singing and a little Doc McStuffins made this all better.

Battles are always going to come, but God will prevail throughout it all. Be blessed!!!