Tag: surgery

Friendship

Today on Easter I am reminded of how amazing our God is! When I think of the cross and what He did for me there is nothing I can do but rejoice! No matter our situations, no matter our trials, the trials we are in today mean nothing. There is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING in the entire world that can change WHO He is and WHAT He has done! Stay focused and keep taking steps towards Him so He can take your life wherever He wants to.

I am still so surprised at the path that I am on. But as we celebrate the incredible gift of eternity that Jesus blessed us with,I am again reminded of His love for us. He loves us so big, and we don’t need to look hard to find the ways. This beauty is one of my dearest friends. I am so blessed and so thankful to have such amazing women in my life. My plan was to be home this week…. But my timing is not His timing so I will enjoy the moments of joy and sunshine in this valley. Thank you for being willing to spend Easter with my family instead of yours, for being willing to juggle all the things this week and for loving us so big.

Bathroom

Took some steps on my own with walker and two PT/OT people. My goal was the bathroom..,, so close but yet SO FAR AWAY 🤪 I almost made it. Sadly they said still not safe or strong enough to do it but progress is progress. Here’s where I want to go tomorrow….. the bathroom…. it’s so close…… referral sent for rehab. They said usually 7-14 days….. feels like an eternity still before I can go home….. please keep praying. I need them and so does my family.

My day surgery with potential one overnight has turned into such a nightmare. I am so tired and so desperately want to be home. I know that He is here with me but I just want to go home. Just want to take a shower…. Just want to hug and love in my family.

I don’t own this song or the lyrics…. But they speak so deeply to me.

Yes I will, lift You high in the lowest valley
Yes I will, bless Your name
Oh, yes I will, sing for joy when my heart is heavy
All my days, oh yes I willI count on one thing
The same God that never fails
Will not fail me now
You won’t fail me now
In the waiting
The same God who’s never late
Is working all things out
Is working all things out

But GOD

Guys yesterday I couldn’t move! Left side pointer finger and left side big toe was all I could move if I concentrated super hard and worked hard. BUT GOD!!!! Look at this!!!! I am claiming for a miracle healing overnight! I NEED to be home with my family! My God is able! He can do exceedingly abundantly about all that we ask. And tonight I am watching it happen with my own eyes! I will eventually share more of this week as I wrap my brain around the trauma and emotion and loss of control. Since I couldn’t move I was listening to elevation worship almost continuously except when sick and headache. The song about seeing a victory And God Never failing was basically on repeat …… this guys! This is what My God did this evening! Agree with me pray with me, God can do this!!!!

When we get into these hard places it is so incredibly important to continue to focus on Him, He has already won the battle that we are in. He already knows the outcome, He already has each breath planned out. I know that right now I am hurting, and overwhelmed and a little bit scared. I don’t know how this all plays out. But you know Who does? My God! I know that I know that I know that we will be ok. God will take care of us regardless of how this plays out.

Up in a chair!
Moving my hand!!!! God is so so good!

My husband….

This update won’t be all inclusive as I am only able to use my right hand but I just have to share a little about this week. Sadly after my “day” surgery I have developed left sided weakness and am unable to use my left side. I can’t begin to tell you what a humbling experience it is to not be able to rollover sit up, go to a toilet, brush my hair,etc by yourself. But guys my husband was truly my night in shining armor this week. I don’t think I have wrapped my brain around this being the way things are right now…. but the first night? Was the worst night of my life. Terrifying to say the least. And Matthew was amazing. Constantly caring and supporting me. I am sure I wasn’t nice or appreciative as I should have been. I still can’t believe that he had to wash my face for me or move my pillows or help me move my hips….. but this guy? Totally showed up and showed me that God is still in control of my body and extremities even if it is through others. Thank you will never be enough for what and how you have loved me during this scary week. I know that God has big plans and that the waiting is hard but we will get there. #Godisbigger #Godsgotthis
https://youtu.be/Cd6J6Wgnv4M

Trying to be Joyful

Trying to be joyful in the journey is certainly a little rough today. Still not functioning like I need to….. so very thankful for lots of love, support, prayers and knowledge from so many. The way this has gone is so unexpected. I never ever thought that this was even a possibility. I knew I would have some pain, knew I would not be able to lift some things, and struggle with neck movement for a little while. I never ever thought I would lose the function of my left side, never thought I wouldn’t be able to brush my hair or teeth, never thought I wouldn’t be able to see my kids for an unknown period of time. Social media can be a detriment but right now for me the messages people have been sending have been such a blessing….

. #Godsgotthis #Godisbigger

Not the way I had planned

Unfortunately I did not head home yesterday as I had hoped. After surgery I began vomiting wind subsequently lost feeling and sensation in my left side. Currently I am I unable to move my left side, unable to sit up unassisted, unable to stand. Surgeon is unsure of what is going on. But my God knows and He is with me in this battle.

Sweet Sophia

My sweet girl has had such a terrible few months.  She has now had strep six times since September.  Her time at middle school has been a challenge due to all this illness.  We finally got her tonsils out this month and she has had quite the time recovering from that as well.  We spent a few days in the hospital after the tonsillectomy due to dehydration and weight loss,  and it was during that period that we are finally starting to look into her being immunocompromised like her siblings.  I don’t know why it is hurting me so much to start saying that out loud.  I don’t know why it seems so overwhelming and scary.  I know this role, I know how to navigate having sick kiddos, but for some reason with her it just feels like too much.  And don’t get me wrong, we don’t have any definitive answers that she is, or isn’t but it is just feeling more and more like she is.  And I am so sad for her.  So sad for what that entails.  So sad that another one of my babies may have such a rough road.  Sometimes I feel guilty, like I did something that caused this.